Confidence is Key

Psalm 139:13-14

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well

I must share that sometimes I do not have the greatest self-esteem. My boobs could be a lot bigger. I do not have abs of steel. Despite the hours i spend at the gym, and the neglect of my favorite fatty foods, I still have cellulite. Also, when my face is at rest and relaxed, I look like I am going to kill someone. I can't walk around with a constant smile on my face (I've tried to do that before but it always results in a migraine). All of these flaws could be fixed with a little plastic surgery. All I'd have to do is drop a few thousand bucks and then I'd be perfect! So what am i waiting for? I have given the idea of plastic surgery a lot of thought. However during those thoughts, I stop myself. There is this voice inside of me that interrupts my thoughts and shouts, 'How dare you! You're perfect the way you are'. So then I stop those insecure thoughts, and try to embrace what I was born with. Therefore, I'll fix myself up, do my hair, put on a little bronzer and mascara, buy the sexiest dress i can find and my confidence level will be a one thousand on a scale of one hundred. Unfortunately, it doesn't take much for my mind to wander yet again, and the insecurities slowly start to contaminate my mind. I'd see the models in my Victoria's Secret catalogs. I'd hang out with my gorgeous friends that have perfect bodies -natural and man-made. And sometimes during my free time I'd even spend hours on the Internet obsessing over celebrities and their looks. So mind you that this is, almost, an everyday battle in my mind -being real vs. nipping, tucking, and adding.

Now this post is NOT about me bashing plastic surgery, heavy make-up, or anything synthetic that enhances a woman's appearance. I am all for women that absolutely know what they want and need to make them feel happy and confident. However, I on the other hand, have no idea what I want; and I refuse to go through with something that I am unsure of. This is simply about me sharing my insecurities, in attempts to help any girl that has the same insecurities as myself.
I think we can all agree that society is to blame for creating the image of a perfect woman. Guys see that image that society creates and then they look for those characteristics in real women. Because of this false image of a woman, that is sculpted by a talented photo shop editor, our confidence level slowly drops. Woman all of a sudden want to be a size 0. We want to have colored contacts. We want bigger boobs. We want acne free tan skin. We want a bubble booty. Yes, we can have all of these features "fixed" at the drop of a dime. However, before we make that decision to alter our God-given appearance, I believe there is something that guys find more attractive than the perfect body....and that is confidence.
That may not be very believable, but confidence in one's self can go a long way, longer than any surgery or hair appointment may last. Confidence is such a powerful yet underrated characteristic. I have girlfriends that are bigger than me in size, and their confidence is bigger as well. Believe me when I say they get all the attention at the club. I see girls with smaller boobs than I, and they are in a happy relationship with fine young men! These examples should give us, the one's who are constantly on the fence about changing our looks, the confidence that we were born with. Why would you want to be with a man that loves you for being artificial? Embrace the assets you were blessed with! If a man truly likes a woman, and does not only want to get in her pants, it is because he ultimately falls for her personality. Confidence can be the sexiest thing that you own. You can't buy a good personality. It does not require surgery to boost your confidence. So before you make an irrational decision to change how God created you, try to own what you have and be proud of it.

   

Shall We Begin...

  I am 20 years young. One could say that I am the female version of an average Joe. I haven't had any traumatic experiences in my life, yet. I was never a wild child. I am not one of those naturally smart people. I am a happy medium between the over-achiever and the slacker. I am far from an athletic or musical prodigy. But, I do have morals that i cherish dearly and i try to abide by them everyday. So that, in my opinion, makes me different from the next. I may not win every battle that life throws at me, but i take every loss as a lesson. So far these losses have sculpted me to be the person that i am. However, this sculpture, for now,is a work in progress. 
 I've decided that if my life were to be written as a book, so far I'd have an intro (1st-8th grade), chapter one (high school), chapter two (tidewater community college), and chapter three (the present). 
The rest of this post would be a summary of chapter one and two (I could possibly go more into depth for each in future posts):
   
In high school, I thought 'this is real life'. I thought my relationships were the "real thing". I thought friends were forever. I thought money was a renewable resource. I thought grades were nothing but letters. I thought 'you are what you wear'. Unfortunately these thoughts soon turned into nothing but theories..false theories.
 After graduation, it seemed that i had an underlying growth of maturity. I finally had an epiphany that the world, obviously, was much bigger than I; There was other people outside of the 757 (Hampton Roads,VA), and that I had so much in store for myself. Unfortunately, after this realization, I would say it took almost a year, after high school, for me to finally move on to the next chapter in my life. During that year I have lost all contact with certain people that i truly cherished as friends. On the contrary I met one person that showed me what love really is. I've developed great work and school ethics. However, my religious ethics could still use a little more work.
In summary, I must say 2011 was one of my favorite years of my life, simply because i grew...mentally.